Writing the Nanny's Letter of Recommendation

The nanny's letter of recommendation from her former employer is an important part of her "Nanny Portfolio," a collection of materials including her resume, work history, educational certifications, and examples of her work that the nanny often uses to help 'sell' herself to prospective employers in the job interview.

When you write the nanny's letter of recommendation, it is important to remember that this letter is not a personal thank you note to the nanny for good service. Rather it is directed to the potential hiring family - a family with young children like yours who is trying to decide whether the nanny will be a competent, caring, and dependable child care choice for them. Remember you are writing this letter parent to parent.

A letter of recommendation is typically organized as follows:

• A general salutation (Dear Sir or Madame) is typically used. You don't know who will be reading this letter, and you want the nanny to be able to use it multiple times if necessary.



• State the basic facts - the dates of employment, the general hours worked, the ages and number of your children, her scope of responsibilities, whether she lived in or out. This serves to confirm the nanny's resume data.


• Next, choose three or four of your nanny's positive traits that meant the most to you as a parent. Describe your nanny's positive traits in typical sales "Feature" and "Benefit" terms. For example, you nanny was always punctual (the feature) so you were never late for important appointments, etc. due to tardiness (the benefit). Your nanny might have a take charge attitude (the feature) that allowed you to go about your business day without numerous interruptions and questions from the nanny (the benefit). Your nanny might have a very positive attitude and sunny disposition (the feature) that allowed her to deal with repetitive or difficult situations without ever being cross or discouraged (the benefit). It is helpful if you could provide a specific example of some, if not all, of the positive traits. For example:
  
  

  "Mary is unfailingly cheerful and has a positive outlook on life. Our child is developmentally challenged, and day after day Mary enveloped him in encouragement, acceptance and love. Our child continues to achieve beyond our expectations, and, like Mary, never becomes discouraged. Mary's sunny disposition and positive attitude are a blessing to any child."

  
  


• It is helpful to describe why the employment ended and your regret in losing your valued nanny.



• Provide the parents with a way to contact you should they have further questions. You should leave either a telephone number or a permanent email address. Your physical street address is not required, nor is it recommended due to safety considerations.


• Always make sure the letter is signed and dated.

Changing jobs is stressful for a nanny, even more so when she is leaving a situation that she loves and where she knows she was appreciated. This letter really is a thank you to your nanny - one of the nicest ways you can put the final punctuation mark to your employment relationship.

Managing Childcare Costs in a Troubled Economy

Child care is expensive - ask any working parent. Child care is often the second largest monthly expense, after mortgage/rent payments, which a family with young children deals with.

According to the National Association of Child Care Resource and Referral Agencies (NACCRA), full time infant care in a child care center in the District of Columbia averages $10,400 per year. In New York State, this figure is $13,437 - more than $1000 per month! Center based infant child care is in great demand - many of the accredited centers have waiting lists that are many months long.

Many new parents will consider hiring a nanny to care for their infant - that is until they price the local nanny markets. Nationally a full time nanny earns $400 - $700 per week, and in major urban centers it can be difficult to find an experienced, legal nanny with references for under $600 per week.

So how are families to manage these infant care expenses? Sharing a nanny is the solution for a growing number of families.

In a nanny share, two families will share the services of a single nanny. Costs are split in any number of creative ways, most commonly evenly split between the families. In a nanny share arrangement, the nanny often earns a premium over her counterparts employed by a single family - from 10- 20% more. Split down the middle, however, this creates a win-win situation for the families and the caregiver.

A nanny can be more flexible with hours than a center, and a nanny will provide sick child care that centers cannot. In a nanny share, the infants are typically only exposed to each other, reducing the spread of childhood illnesses. Typically one family 'hosts' the share. That is to say, the care occurs at the 'host' family's home. The other family in the share drops off and picks up their child daily.

Nanny shares, while a great cost cutting vehicle, have their own set of issues to be addressed by the families and the nanny. These include:

• Coordination of Schedules: The two families should have very similar needs for care. The closer the family schedules are to each other, the happier everyone will be.
  
  


• Child rearing philosophies: The nanny caring for two infants needs to treat them similarly. If one family believes in 'cry it out' and the other in 'attachment parenting' this is a recipe for a failed nanny share. Consider discipline (hard to imagine with a 6 week old, but definitely an issue coming in the future), diet, TV watching, outdoor activities, nap schedules and the myriad things that can create conflict between the parents in the share, or between parent and nanny.
  
  


• Ages of the children and the number of children: The best situations are where two children of similar ages are being cared for together. It is the exceptional nanny who can handle more than two infants and more than 4 total children all day. An infant who naps twice daily will limit the outdoor activities of older children in the home, an important consideration for many parents. Remember, in a child care center the caregivers are given breaks, and there is floating staff available in emergency or stressful situations (tummy flu anyone?). The nanny typically works for 8 - 9 hours at a stretch without a meaningful break.
  
  


• The anticipated length of the share arrangement: Some families enter into a nanny share as a stop gap while they await an opening in a day care center. Others are looking for home based, non-institutional, care for their child through age 2 or the start of pre-school. It is important that the families have a frank discussion of their plans and expectations. No one wants to come home on a Friday only to discover that their share partner got the coveted slot in the downtown daycare center and they will not be sharing the nanny going forward. Nanny also needs to be apprised of expectations, and given both notice and a reference when the share comes to an end.
  
  


• Sick Care Policies: Most families will agree that fever, vomiting, or diarrhea are all illnesses that should cancel the share for the day. But what about the nanny? Will she care for the sick child? The healthy child? What if the healthy child doesn't live in the home where the care is provided? Families need to be very frank with each other, BEFORE the situation arises, as to how this will be handled.
  
  


• Payroll Taxes:Both families are the nanny's employers, and each is responsible to report and pay their family's share of the payroll taxes. Payroll inequities such as one family handling the taxes correctly and the other family paying under the table lead to tension in the share. The nanny who receives $275 after taxes from one family and $300 cash from the other is put in an uncomfortable situation.
  
  


• Compensation and Benefits: What about paid vacation and sick time? Will the families coordinate their vacation times with each other? If not, when does the nanny get vacation? What happens if the nanny is sick - will the two families alternate providing back up care, or each fend for themselves? Many shares dissolve when these logistical issues come between the parents or between parents and nanny.
  
  


• What about licensing and insurance? In states such as Maryland and Washington, when two or more families hire a nanny to care for non-related children at the same time, a state family child care license is required. You will want to check your state's requirements, and the host family definitely needs to have a frank conversation with their insurance agent about liability (worker's compensation, claims by the non-host family, transportation liability).

So what are some best practices in a nanny share?

• Both families should interview potential nannies together if possible. If Family A already has a nanny and family and nanny mutually decide a share is in their best interests, Family B should have an opportunity to independently interview both Family A and the nanny.
  
  


• Write down the details. This should be a three way document between both families and the nanny and it should detail the possible issues above - hours, wages, benefits, taxes, sick care policies, vacation and nanny sick days.
  
  


• Have periodic meetings - issues large and small that you never anticipated will come up and having a regularly scheduled meeting time (once monthly is usually sufficient) gives you the opportunity to bring up any concerns.
  
  


• Deal fairly with expenses. Each family needs to supply it's own diapers, wipes, and baby food. When the children graduate to table food, the non-host family should make a meaningful contribution to the hosting family's pantry. Consider extra car seats, pack and play for napping, or tandem strollers.

Nanny sharing is a wonderful way to provide your child with very personalized, home-base child care and share the costs of this care with another family. Many families find that the nanny share is the answer to managing their infant care expenses.

More Information:
Nanny taxes and the nanny share

Social Security Number | Name Mismatch

The Associated Press reports today that the IRS is releasing hundreds of thousands of delayed stimulus checks to married couples where the spouse's name and Social Security Number did not match SSA records.

This highlights a common problem we see with BOTH nanny employers and the nannies themselves. When you marry or divorce and change your name, you must notify the Social Security Administration to update their records.

We annually deal with many rejected W-2 filings for our clients when the nanny's name and SSN do not match. This causes a big hassle (no e-Filing for the nanny just for starters) and a waste of time and resources on everyone's part. Have you ever dealt with fixing a problem with the IRS and SSA simultaneously? {shudder}

Do you or your employee need to change their name with the SSA? SSA provides step by step instructions at the Social Security Administration's web site.

NannyPalooza 2008 Re-cap

I just returned from 3 days in Philadelphia attending the annual NannyPalooza conference, sponsored by the National Association for Nanny Care, a non-profit organization dedicated to raising the professionalism of nanny care. As always, the program was outstanding.

Melanie Nesbit, The Nanny on the Move and Clelie Bourne, the Temporary Nanny were among the many specialty nannies in attendance. There was a special visit from the Today Show, who interviewed traveling nannies, newborn care specialists, temporary nannies, and nannies who specialize in multiples, children with developmental disorders, and even teen-agers! What a diverse spectrum of talents.

I had dinner with several nanny agency owners from across the country, where we discussed the state of the industry, as well as the impact the current financial crisis was having on the nanny referral industry. Kimberly Tellus, from New York's Nanny Care Connections reports more inquiries about live in nannies in Manhattan, their agency's specialty. A live-in nanny typically earns 10% - 20% less than their "come-and-go" counterparts in New York City, primarily because they receive room and board in addition to their weekly wage. Kim's business partner, Amanda Marsh, serves as their primary recruiter from her base in Nebraska.

Anie Tandler of McLean VA based Special Care Nannies provides specialized placements for children with special needs, especially autism spectrum disorders. She is one of two agencies nationwide with that specialty (Anie's long career teaching special needs children and coaching/counseling their families in public and private school settings makes her uniquely qualified for this endeavor). She actually will meet with the family to determine their needs before placement, then will provide the selected nanny candidate with specialized training related to the child's disability.

Nettie Weber, Perfect Match Nannies, reported back on her highly successful annual Nanny Retreat, sponsored by her Wisconsin agency. Nannies this year worked on advanced safety/CPR techniques as well as nanny portfolios.

Agencies are increasingly stepping up and educating their clients about nanny tax, insurance, and overtime issues. Many refer their clients to 4nannytaxes.com's website for detailed information and our online nanny payroll tax calculator and family budget tool.

The nanny industry is definitely NOT about babysitting! Infant care specialists provide families with sleep training. Nannies specializing in multiples often bring their wealth of "been there, done that" experience to enrich the experiences of often overwhelmed and bewildered new parents. Nannies who specialize in the teen years help with college placement, and provide important supervision and guidance to their charges. (One such nanny, tongue in cheek, professed to be on "pregnancy prevention patrol"!)

Families, please consider sponsoring your nanny for this conference next year. The educational opportunity is invaluable, and sends the message to your nanny that you truly value the contribution she makes to your family as well as validating her career choice!